old friends, and my old stomping grounds - but it's such a different way of life down here. I've realized I have completely outgrown the small-town mentality that is my hometown. From the ridiculously low speed limits to the very apparent narrow outlooks on life, sometimes I wonder how I made it out of here with all of my sanity (well, at least I like to think I'm a pretty sane person). I'm just grateful I made it out of here at all. Not everyone does.I made a last minute trip home this week for a few days. I bummed a ride home with my friend, Claire, yesterday. On Monday, we drove from Athens straight to
Tybee for a few hours on the beach before going home. It was a little chilly with the breeze, but it was so nice to sit on the beach with the wind and the sun and just be outside on a beautiful day. We listened to music and laughed about old high school memories. Claire threw some raisins from her trail mix that she didn't want, attracting about 923 seagulls to hover around us for the next hour. We all took off our bathing suit cover ups... and quickly put them back on when the wind picked up and it got chilly. But we laid there and enjoyed the day and each other's company.When I finally got to the house, I was greeted with a million gnats in my driveway. Atlanta doesn't have bugs like Savannah does - I love that about Atlanta. My mom was cooking dinner; she's a great cook. Dad was watching TV, like always. I went to my brother's room to say hello, and we ended up getting into an hour long heart-to-heart about everything he's been going through the past few months. My heart breaks for him. I know he wants to do better; for the past 10 years he's been trying to turn things around for himself. He told me that he's going to enlist in the Army, pending the results of his court date tomorrow. I couldn't help but cry and feel so scared for him. I'm really trying to be supportive of his decisions; he really just needs support and love right now.
Last night I was hoping to tell my dad that I'm for sure going to China. Back around Thanksgiving when I first mentioned it to him, the conversation didn't go too well. Dad blames a lot of the US' problems on China and thinks me going on a trip there for study abroad is supporting their economics, politics, and culture. He can't look at it as an educational experience. Hopefully I'll get to talk to him about it tonight and get it over with. It probably won't be a pleasant conversation.
My mom and I stayed up talking for hours late last night. I love my mom; she's such a strong woman. I hope to have half the emotional and mental strength she has when I am her age. I wish I could see her more often. She's always been my rock and my #1 fan.
I feel guilty talking to my family about all of my accomplishments and all of the positive things I have going on in my life. Everyone else in the family has some kind of drama going on, big stuff that I can't help them with. I feel like every conversation I have with my family is me listening to what's going on with them. I don't mind it; I want to be supportive and be there for them. And I don't want to "rub it in" with how well I'm doing in school or anything, but I do want to celebrate my accomplishments with my family. They are a huge part of my success; I hope they know that.
It was a short trip home, but I'm glad I came. I'll be leaving here in the morning, just in time to enjoy the trip without getting too stir crazy.
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